Bits of blue. Nothing. Some more blue. And then
nothing, again. Flutter of eyelashes. He´s awake now. Eyelids are opening
slowly. Adjusting to the lightning in the room. They´re way too heavy. He
closes them again. Shutting down the outside world won´t help you, my dear.
Lips slightly parted. Sucking in small breaths. To
wash off the venom. Actually, there´s nothing poetic in this act. It´s just
reflex. Trying not to suffocate. He´s still somewhere in between the state of
slumber and being awake.
I roll to my stomach. Stretching my arms in front of
me and then crossing them and laying my head on them.
Concentration on his breathing. He´s deciding whether
to wake up or go back to sleep. Deep breaths alternate with shallow ones. Sharp
inhale. Awake. Conscious.
He focuses on me. By now, he knows I´ve been observing
him like a puzzle ready to be solved. He doesn´t seem to mind. I don´t see red
anymore. The aura around us from yesterday is long gone. It pains me when we
argue. He hates it even more.
Dilated pupils are circled by bright blue iris. Colour
is always changing with light and mood. Dimness of the room made them stand out
even more against his dark hair. Dilated pupils are result of sleepiness.
Harmless. Innocent. Charming. I´m few inches from his face.
Listening to his heartbeat. It seems to be put
off a little bit. But it isn´t slowing down or anything. So it´s fine, right?
Inhale. The rush of blood in heart. It´s coming in
waves. Starting in right atrium. Following steadily into right chamber. Another
wave hits the pulmonary artery dividing into right and left side. They lead the
blood into lungs. It returns back by the pulmonary veins. Two from each side.
Coming through left atrium and ending in the left chamber. Exhale.
Milliseconds. The same cycle all over again. It can´t
alter on its own. There´s some system in every chaotic body. Same cycle all
over again. Like breathing. Like you.
photos & text by me
